Something Has Changed On Medium — Quick, Time to Panic!

There’s no time to waste, we need to make kneejerk decisions NOW

Photo by Alessandro Bellone on Unsplash

Everyone, listen up!

Medium has made a change and it’s the most important, life-altering change since whatever the last one was.

(Something about claps? Who even remembers?)

The most important thing is to remember that we must rush and make snap decisions. Ideally, we need to do so before the scary change has even kicked in.

Complain to Medium? Absolutely, let’s do that before be fully understand how the changes impact us. Leave the platform? Sure, that’ll show 'em…something.

Consult lawyers! Do they have to specialise in the area of law this pertains to? No! In fact, they don’t even have to be a real lawyer! Have a friend who has watched a lot of Judge Judy? They’ll do!

Also, don’t forget to speculate wildly.

Medium has sold our stories to a Chinese content mill!

Medium is going to make a hit HBO show out of every single story on the platform and we won’t see a dime!

Medium is going to build a zeppelin to fly around the world, pumping out audio recordings of our stories on a megaphone! Will we get paid? Oh no, of course not!

You know what would really show this place what for? If we all up and leave. Plenty of other places to go!

Wait, what do you mean they all have the same terms of service?

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